We designed this site in order to keep in touch with friends and family who are far away and in order to communicate with other adoptive families from around the world.

When we first started researching this wonderful way to become a family we read everything we could get our hands on. Even though there are a lot of great books out there, nothing was as informative or touching as the blogs we found by adoptees, biological parents, and adoptive families. So we are writing this blog now in hopes of returning the favor. We hope that if you are dear to us you will enjoy keeping up with our adventures. If you are someone out there involved in a part of the adoption triad we hope you will find information and comfort here and provide us with some of your own!

If you would like to get in touch with us we can be reached at:
Feel free to stop by anytime. We're happy to share our family story.

Take care,
Brian and Rosemary

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Nervous Nelly

So I am in an interesting place. It's sort of a panicky, angsty, overwrought place. Yea, I said interesting, not pleasant. We just moved to a new town where we don't know a single soul. I desperately miss our friends and families right now. I am so very much wishing I could share this time with them. And by "share" I mean send up a flare for some freakin' help!

We are hoping against hope that we will be picking Button up in 5 months so I have a ferocious need to prepare for the baby right now. I know you can all understand that what this has created is one crazy lady-friend. Brian keeps saying, in this very calm and patient voice, "But we have plenty of time to worry about baby stuff later." Total guy statement, right? I have no idea how long it takes to get a nursery ready but the room we plan on using is currently painted this hideous color of olive green, from the last tenant, and is basically acting as a storage closet. Plus, we need to toddler proof (which everyone says is much harder than baby proofing) and we can't toddler proof a house where we haven't even finished hanging pictures yet.

Then we have to get all the stuff for Button and, apparently, Button requires a huge amount of stuff. Just the amount of all new, semi-important choices we have to make is exhausting. What kind of car seat? What kind of formula? What kind of diapers? What if I buy the bad, evil, plastic bottles that leach toxins? Just walking into the Babies R' Us practically requires a graduate degree in consumer reporting!

Oh yea, I had a teeny-tiny break down at the Babies R' Us and we had to leave. Don't worry, I didn't attack any innocent employees, I just started to cry in the playpen aisle. It is my firm belief that the store is designed to overwhelm and I am sure that many dozens of women have had similar reactions. Well, that's what I'm telling myself so don't burst my bubble, ok? And all of that foolishness doesn't even begin to touch on the really important choices we need to make like finding a pediatrician and researching vaccines. How did the human race ever survive through the dark ages? Right, we almost didn't...

Aston Church Mother's Union circa 1953

I just feel like my head is about to explode with all the lists of everything that has to be done and I wish that someone would call in the cavalry. What? You mean to say that an army of 1950's housewives will not be coming to my aid? I have to do it myself! This is what parenting is all about?? Ummm yea, is there someone else I can speak to?



Robin and Kyle said...

Don't Panic! Are you a Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy fan? Then you should know that all you really need it a towel. ;)

rosemary said...

LOL, Robin! I must keep reminding myself of that!!

Jessica said...

Babies R Us IS confusing. I always decide what I'm going to buy someone off of a registry based on what I can find first regardless of price and/or taste. Hang in there. You've moved to an amazing town, you just did it at a complicated time!

Chris and Terri said...

Girl - you need to go back to square one - I am Roses - I am a smart, beautiful woman and I have complete control of this situation and everything is great.

Break it down - like a wedding planner - fill in your own tasks but this is what I'm doing. I can't possibly think about it all at once and I've done this twice!

5 months out - buy clothes for trip - it's hot there and they are all on sale, pick out nursery stuff, stroller, baby carrier

4 months out - nursery - do it! pick out high chair/booster, car seats

3 months out - go buy the big stuff

2 months out - baby proof and buy the little stuff, spoons, bottles, toys, winter clothes but not a lot because we have no idea how big they will be.

1 month out - only last minute stuff - travel, packing and such

As far as Babys R Us, wow it's a big overwhelming place with a lot of stuff - a lot of it you don't need. I walked every aisle once (it's too much) and now I go to the section I'm focusing on and ignore the rest.

You are not alone. I'm at the exact same spot and we will be ok! Post it on the message board and you'll get good feedback. I promise!

kyungmee said...

I found your site through the third Mom Blog..and read over some of your posts. I wish you the best with your adoption process! I think it is so very wonderful that you are reaching out to others who are adopting or adoptees to learn,understand, and appreciate the weight of adoption and the joys it can bring into 'both worlds'. Yours and your child! I truely believe it can be a beautiful thing if people can like youselves open your hearts and minds to the 'whole' adopting experience. Looking forward to reading more to come and hope you the best days to come! I forgot to mention, I am an adoptee from Korea. I was adopted around 7 years old to a caucacion family (celebrating our Italian side:) I had recently created a blog myself to share my experiences in short story form..hope you can come and visit! the site is
from , KyungMee

a Tonggu Momma said...

We did not have a strong social circle when we brought home the Tongginator. We had moved to the next town over, which didn't seem THAT far, but then the five couples/ families we were closest with ALL moved out of state within months of travel. My strongest suggestion - read "post adoption blues" by Foli NOW, before you travel. It will help you feel better, especially since you feel a bit isolated at the moment (like I did). Hugs.

And yes, all you really need is a towel. Heh.

Maci Miller said...

Rosemary you are so funny. You are also brilliant and will handle this all perfectly! This IS overwhelming. I tear up every time I go to BabiesRUS. Mostly, I think, because I actually have a real reason to go there! There is a lot to do, to remember, to read (okay, you got that part), to research, etc. I've done entirely TOO much shopping and research for the best/greenest/cutest/environmentally friendly stuff on the planet for kids so call me. I am here to help! I absolutely LOVE a decorating project so you can pick my brain all day long on that one too!
You are such an incredible and thoughtful person and you are going to be such a great parent! The rest (as much emphasis as we all put on it- especially me) is really not that important. Yes, you can remind me of this speech the next time I am freaking out about what I still need to get for Ruby.
Now if you need a cool, calm voice of better talk to Terri cause I am ready to hire her myself to help me with MY lists! I LOVE her advice above! :-)