Greetings!

We designed this site in order to keep in touch with friends and family who are far away and in order to communicate with other adoptive families from around the world.

When we first started researching this wonderful way to become a family we read everything we could get our hands on. Even though there are a lot of great books out there, nothing was as informative or touching as the blogs we found by adoptees, biological parents, and adoptive families. So we are writing this blog now in hopes of returning the favor. We hope that if you are dear to us you will enjoy keeping up with our adventures. If you are someone out there involved in a part of the adoption triad we hope you will find information and comfort here and provide us with some of your own!

If you would like to get in touch with us we can be reached at: becomingafamily@gmail.com
Feel free to stop by anytime. We're happy to share our family story.

Take care,
Brian and Rosemary

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Language

It has been 2 months since we met Button and I can say, without a doubt, that the number one change is language. Button's ability to understand what we are saying has decreased his anger and frustration level by about 75% and his ability to communicate his simple toddler needs has raised his trust in us a huge extent. He tells us what he wants i.e. cup and then we give it to him = he feels he can trust us to provide for him. You might be thinking that is a ridiculous oversimplification of relationship. Well, of course, it's not everything - not even close - but like I said before language has brought the single most powerful change we've seen so far.

For instance, 1 month ago a scenario would play out where he would start screaming suddenly and for no discernable reason. I would ask over and over what he wanted. I would volunteer objects. I would carefully check the big 3: tired, hungry, wet. If I didn't get lucky and happen upon the desired item (one time it was a tiny plastic cat sitting in a high windowsill) after kicking and hitting attempts, he would simply scream himself out. Now just a month later, he can easily just tell me what he wants but if he gets too hungry and starts to head down this road I say,"Button can you point to what you want?" He will then point at the object. If it is a word he knows like "truck" I will say, "Can you ask nicely for that truck?" and he will say, "Peas tuck." If it is a new word we will practice that word once and then he can play with the item.

His ability to express himself and to understand us has released so much fear from our beautiful little boy. Don't get too excited here, but sometimes he will even play with his car in the hallway and allow me to go into the potty-room alone...if I leave the door open and if I sing the whole time. Baby steps, folks, baby steps.

--Rosemary

5 comments:

Jessica said...

I'm doomed. I can't sing worth a tune in a bucket. But for peacefully pottytime, looks like we may all have to suffer through.

Did Button ask for things in Thai intially/respond to Thai or was it just a general langauge issue?

Brazenlilly said...

Rosemary, I know I may be repeating myself, but thank you for posting these little stories about your life with Button. I'm eating it up! I loved "don't get too excited here..."! That made me laugh out loud. I don't even know you, but I feel proud of you and the way you are growing and learning right along with Button. I AM getting excited here!

Sharon said...

Loving your posts Rosemary!!

Sharon
Australia

Jay and Chandra and Penny Regan said...

Congratulations on those baby steps! Even my teenage daughter didn't want me to go into the bathroom. But, I did not open the door and sing to her.

Maci Miller said...

haha, it took forever for me to be able to go to the bathroom without her being in there with me. Should would sprint across the room to come in with me! But hey, this is a great sign of attachment! He needs to see his Momma! Awesome on the baby steps. You will keep having more and more of them and it will keep getting easier. So great to hear about him understanding more. I love how he says PEAS. So cute!
Oh, and a little hint. I found Ruby to be quite the snacker and have avoided many a meltdown (and the too hungry thing) by having my bag stuffed with snacks on every occasion. Even if it's before dinner I will let her have just a little something...carrots, crackers, whatever, and it hasn't hurt her appetite one bit. But it did curb a lot of moods. You may already have done this but sharing just in case. So happy things are going well!

More pictures please!!!